The New Whip

I am now taking suggestions for names...

I've decided she's a she.

So far we have Vikki and Lucy in the pool.

PS I LOVE THIS NEW CAR. I wasn't sure that she'd be worth all the brain damage this week but...

she is.

Handing Out Smiles

Today I made a quick run to Wal-mart for just a few things. No hurry, no need to.

It wasn't busy but the lines were long and I thought I'd hit the jackpot when I found a line with just one lady and only a few things left on the belt. Turns out she had a million coupons and did NOT want the items that the coupons didn't work on. I worked as a checker for awhile and let me just say; I was very impressed with the girl at the checkout for being so patient. And like I said, I was in no rush and just shrugged it off as people loaded their few things, realized this was going to take awhile, packed back up and left.

With just a few hundred coupons left and one man packing up his stuff, an old man rolled up in a motorized cart filled mostly with a bag of wood chips, and maybe 5 other things. I knew I had a minute so I thought I'd offer to help to unload his cart so he wouldn't have to get up, awkwardly reach around things to put them on the belt, sit back down and pull forward.

He was so sweet and gracious and as I finished I saw him fishing around in his shirt pocket. I went totally red as he said "You've earned a reward". I didn't want a reward. I was just helping out and it is so embarrassing to me when you get a pushy old person trying to hand you a few dollars for nothing more than passing the time waiting in the grocery line.

"Oh no, please, you don't owe me anything."
"Just wait and see what it is" He had a little bit of an exasperated tone that almost made me laugh, but instead made me blush even more.... this is what he pulls out...

He hands me these one at a time and says "Here's a new washer... and dryer... for your help. One year warranty even... but I won't tell you my name *wink*"

I laughed out loud and said thank you. 

Then he told me that he and his wife (for whom he was buying a dozen roses which I find adorable) had handed out over 9000 of these little gifts just to make people smile... which I did. 

I'm not sure why but I was SO TOUCHED at that little gesture. This week has been a stressing one. I'm tired and very ready for the weekend. In thinking about the week... I haven't smiled much, and if I have, the smiles are far out numbered by tears. It a little disturbing that I can't think of one good, genuine, can't help it smile all week. It's Thursday! But that is exactly what this cute old man gave me. Me and 8999+ other people. A genuine laugh and smile. 

Just goes to show that it doesn't take much to hand out a smile and make someone's day.

Brain Damage

In the words of a Burt... THIS WEEK HAS BEEN TOTAL BRAIN DAMAGE.

Good things are coming of it, but still.

I am no longer the owner of a beautiful Mazda 3 Hatchback named Penelope.

I am no longer the owner of any car actually.

I sold my car at a great price. Did what is called an in-and-out at the dealership to get another great deal. Looking for a car at Murdock Hyundai, where my brother works and my dad knows the owner... another great deal.

Somewhere in the western United States is a white or red 2011 Hyundai Elantra with my name on it. I'm just not sure where, nor is the dealership. BRAIN DAMAGE. Don't get me wrong. I'm excited. Sleek looking new car. All of the features I want. Better price than I was expecting. Automatic so my arm should feel a little better (added to the snazzy new keyboard at work and maybe I can avoid getting cut up after all)

I'm having a little postpartum depression. I loved my jinxed little Penelope....

Don't worry, I bought some ice cream on my way home.

Now to wait... and think of a name for the new whip.

Right at my Fingertips

I have an iPhone. I love it for many MANY reasons. I can play games, google things, watch movies and TV, check the weather, read a book, download and listen to music, check my bank account, make a shopping list, and SO MUCH MORE.

I also have the LDS app "Gospel Library". I have a full set of scriptures, the hymn book, and any manual or church magazine right there on my phone's screen. I can access it whenever and where ever I want. I can mark things, link verses, add tags and notes and then I can sign on to LDS.org and see it all transferred there. I used to carry around this GINORMOUS church bag on Sundays and now I just make sure I grab my phone.

I've had this awesome resource for a few months now and just this week it hit me how amazing it really is. Maybe because it's been a bit of an emotional week. I had a good long talk about life with my bishop. I found myself pulling up conference talks and scriptures in the hallway at work, waiting for my eye doctor appointment, and sitting in the parking lot at Wal-mart even. I know it shouldn't make a difference, but it just seemed so hard to pull out scriptures or an Ensign in public places, but now... for all anyone else knows I'm just very concentrated on a game of Fruit Ninja.

On top of all of that... my phone gives me access to amazing friends that support and comfort me. 

Sometimes I feel like cell phones are a problem bordering on addiction, but this week I have felt very blessed to have so much right at my fingertips.

Monday

First, excuse my tired rantings from yesterday... but that honestly really bugs. Idk that it bugs enough to post it for the whole world to see but I'm not one to delete posts.

Moving on.

Today was a "MONDAY". Don't get me wrong here, I've had plenty of "MONDAYS" but oh wow. Sure, in high school there were those days where you had a ton of homework and it all seemed super important and stressful and like you were walking around like one of those little goblin things on Labyrinth with a TON of stuff on top of you. Ya know...

...this thing.

But it was high school. I never really thought homework was super important so even the big stuff was no big deal. A line of thinking that meant I never really did homework...

Sure I get stressed about deadlines, and often make things out to be more important than they actually are, but it was a little shocking to realize that today was really one of THOSE MONDAYS.

Today was a Monday where I seriously wished at 3PM that it was only noon so I could have more time to do things. That seems crazy, but 1/3 of my team at work is missing. I'm trying to keep up with everything... and I'm really doing fine, but it all seems so important. I was trying to answer 15 emails at once, finish entering the pile of attorney mail, get the right deadlines on all of the pleadings so cases won't drop (or so that we don't get sued), I am supposed to be writing a wiki page, typing up discovery, AND fixing my huge mix-up from church yesterday. All using a new ergonomic totally weird/awesome keyboard that slows me down, but again, is awesome (The keyboard was THE most exciting part of my day, btw. I know NERD.)

Surprisingly, I'm not grumpy... I don't even feel like I'm whining... Just one of those "when did I become a grown up" moments I guess. It hits pretty hard sometimes... I just sit and wonder where the heck high school went.

Luckily I've had A LOT of practice with what will now be referred to as mini-Mondays and I know EXACTLY how to handle this.

Diet Coke.

Carbs for dinner.

Awesome movie.

Off to some outdoor FHE.

Later, hit the McD drive-thru for a $1 ice cream cone (and maybe another Diet Coke).

Bubble bath....

and BRING ON TUESDAY!

Bad Guys

Just a short post to pose a question....

WHY do people drive around with this on their cars?

This might come off as slightly nerdy but HELLO!!! This is a Decepticon! They are the bad guys. You know the tyranical, power mad, want to overthrow the Earth side of things? Bad guys.

Call me weird or dorky or whatever but this is a pet peeve of mine. Why not just put a sticker on your car that says, "Hi, I'm a douche"? And on that note... I've seen stickers that pretty much do say that... WHY?!

On the flip side... those little stick figure family stickers.... those bug me too. And stupid bumper stickers all over. And those Calvin peeing on things stickers.

Come on people!

Alright, I'm done ranting.

Cut Me Open

No really... that's what they want to do!

I complain quite frequently. I just like to whine. I find it cleansing.

Most of the time I whine about my emotional problems, struggles, moods, etc etc.... As you well know if you frequent my blog.

It's quite the opposite when it comes to physical pain. Idk what it is but pain just doesn't matter to me. It is something that can be pushed through and dealt with. Oh sure I whine about it (we've covered this already) but I don't ever really do much about it. I just push on through. I learned that pretty early. I injured my knee at 11 and found myself scooting on my butt down the stairs. I hated having to do that and give in to that. Ever since then I just don't mention my knee much. I joke about it aching when it rains (which it actually does) and you may occasionally see me walk with a slight limp, but it isn't worth mentioning really. It isn't interesting and it's slightly embarrassing for me to admit when pain is getting the better of me. But here I go....

This time it's my arm, not my knee (my goodness I'm falling apart!) I've done my best to ignore it. Mostly because I dislike doctors. A doctor's visit just feels like sitting next to the kid that likes to poke bruises. "Does this hurt?" "UM YEAH! HELLO! I just told you that hurts!" I finally went to the doctor about a year ago for this arm issue. It's kind of a big deal when your fingers are tingly all the time right? And when the tingle turns to an ache... and that ache travels up your arm... then wakes you up at night... and forces you to wear an embarrassing brace to work just to make it through the day... yep, it's time to suck it up and see the doctor.

Last time he put me on a monster anti-inflammatory and it worked really well for awhile. I was hoping for something along the same lines. Nope, not this time. "Keep doing what you're doing to treat it non-invasively. Anti-inflammatories have their own set of issues, so take something only when you feel like you need it. When it gets to the point that you can't stand it any more, it's a simple enough surgery."

In my head I'm thinking... duh I can't stand it any more. THAT'S WHY I'M HERE! Oh.... crap....

Obviously there is no rush or emergency in this. I convince myself that I can avoid that route a few times a day... then the tingly turned burning aching comes back and... Oh... crap.

I guess they're going to get to cut me open after all. I'm terrified. Having nightmares terrified.

Slightly paranoid + already hurting + total chicken =/= Good happy thoughts.

Not sure when this will be happening but I've pretty much decided that it will be eventually... probably soon.

Any encouragement or reassurance would be appreciated.

<3

Theme Song

I have a lot of these but let's just add this one to the list.

Marching On - OneRepublic

If you have the chance... check out the Timbaland version.

Amazing.

Goes right a lot with my motto.... which is why I love music.... some people just say it (sing it) better.